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We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex , a better orgasm, or a better relationship.

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Trying to be intimate when you’re miles apart is bound to be awkward at first and at times, but that’s OK. Most of all, the best tip I could give you is to remember to be yourself.

Sexting has a way of making people feel like they have to put on an act or pretend to be someone else.

Send him a text earlier in the day saying, “my roommate is out tonight. ”There are toys specifically designed for long-distance couples, like the Oh My Bod Club Vibe 2. These toys can be operated remotely, meaning that you can give control over to your boyfriend and pretend that it’s him there stimulating you. When you’re in a long-distance relationship, you’ll come to recognize how precious your time together is.

Or you can send each other sexy presents to use the next time you see each other. You’ll learn how to cram a lot of intimacy and connection into the moments you do get to share.

Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a licensed sex psychotherapist based in San Francisco, to help us out with the specifics.

This week’s topic: How to have video and phone sex when you're in a long distance relationship.

For an easy place to start, or a smooth way to transition into dirty talk, bring up of your favorite memories of having sex together.

Say something like, “you know what just popped into my head today?

Make sure to put a note saying “Private” or “For later” in the subject so he doesn’t open it at an inopportune time.

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